I came home from work one day this week, took a shower, got into bed and fell asleep for half an hour. I had no idea I was so tired but it just felt like what my body needed at that moment.
In my coaching sessions, I’ve been asking how I can help as the school year comes to an end and the responses are not what I can do but more what they can do to help themselves.
One teacher told me they fell asleep in their living room on Sunday at 2pm, moved to their bed at 7pm and slept until morning. It was what their body needed. They listened. It helped.
Are you listening to what your body needs and then taking action?
Your body will keep telling you the message louder and louder until you listen.
Being transparent about how you take care of yourself, especially during the hard seasons, teaches students that regulation is a skill, not something we are magically born with.
If we ignore our mental health, it reveals itself at school - we have less patience, we are quicker to raise our voice and challenging behaviors increase.
Students feel adult dysregulation. It impacts them. And adults deserve support too.
Recently, results from a district wide student survey on social emotional learning in the classroom uncovered that students want their teachers to be more calm and more regulated. They want teachers to model the regulation skills they are teaching students.
Teachers raise their voices and at times “lose it” at work. Not intentionally but because their nervous system is stressed and it’s reacting.
One teacher’s recent reflection:
“…at this point of the year my patience is running thin and I tend to snap at my students when they make poor choices because I know that they know it is a bad choice. However, I need to ensure I am not escalating their behaviors when I am not staying calm and offering them choices, giving them space and time to calm down and regulate their emotions.”
It can be hard in the moment to stay calm. It’s a muscle that must be exercised to get stronger. If you stop exercising the muscle, it gets smaller, just like working out at the gym.
Meditation or mindfulness practice is the exercise to strengthen this muscle. Research shows that even three deep breaths can help shift your nervous system out of a stress response by:
And just 5 minutes of focused breathing can:
Before you get out of the car at school, during passing periods, or when you go to the bathroom add three deep breaths. Then notice, does your nervous system feel different?
We are all human. We make mistakes. But it’s what we do in between the mistakes that makes the difference.
Take care of yourself, so you can take care of your students.
Your students feel your nervous system every day. Let that message communicate safety and respect.